Brainless
by TryDefyingGravity
Summary: ONESHOT Life is painless for the brainless.


Disclaimer: Not mine. Well done. You worked it out. :P

Summary: Life is painless for the brainless

Brainless

'Help me. Help me, someone.' The scarecrow shouted to the passers by. They all ignored him, convinced they were hearing things and hurried on. No one thought to stop and find the source of the noise. At least he had time to think, properly, for the first time in years.

'_Elphaba, we are going to be together for always. You can see houses flying though the sky, can't you see that?'_

Well, his current situation wasn't promising. It had sent that idea down the drain. Elphaba had obviously changed him into a scarecrow, but why? Was she angry that he had saved her? He couldn't see why she would be, but then again, it was Elphaba. She always did get angry for the most pointless things. Well, _he_ found them pointless. It didn't cross the scarecrows mind that perhaps she had done it to save him. That was beyond his thinking capacity, even as a human.

_Life is painless for the brainless._

Maybe that was true. He didn't think he had a brain. He was in no discomfort, his arms weren't aching. The sun was shining brightly, strong on his face, yet he wasn't burning. Perhaps lacking a brain wouldn't harm him. He had never had much of a brain at Shiz. This wasn't much different after all.

'Help. Help me please! Someone. Anyone?' The scarecrow had seen no one for the past three days and his voice had grown hoarse. Finally he had heard footsteps, and a young girl's voice speaking to someone.

'We can rest here for a while, Dodo. I'm a little tired from all this walking. Dodo?'

Who on earth – well, Oz – was that?

A small bark answered his question. A Dog. No, a dog. Great. The companions came around the corner and the girl climbed onto the fence, facing the scarecrow. He opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out, as he had suddenly recognised the girl. Blue and white checked dress. A bonnet. A small basket. It was Dorothy, Nessa's murderer.

'_Nessa. Oh Nessa, please forgive me.'_

But it wasn't Elphaba's fault. It was this girl's. It couldn't be helped however. He needed to get back to Elphaba and if this girl could assist him, so much the better. Staying on the pole wouldn't get him anywhere. She was going to the Emerald City wasn't she?

He might be able to see the Wizard. He might be able to ask the Wizard what really happened all those years ago. He certainly didn't believe the official story given out by Morrible.

The girl was staring at him. He didn't want to scare her, so he caught her eye and winked. Dorothy looked away and back. The scarecrow winked again. She jumped down from the fence and walked over.

'Err, hello?'

The scarecrow forced what he hoped as a warm smile on his face. 'Hullo.' He murmured. Dorothy stepped back.

'You _are_ real.' Yeah, you'd never guess. He continued.

'Do y… D'ya think you could help me down?'

Dorothy nodded and untied the scarecrow's arms. She gripped his elbow and lifted him from the pole.

'Why thank you miss.' Dorothy smiled encouragingly at the scarecrow. 'But I didn't catch your name, miss, or what you're doing on this lonely road.' He figured it would be weird if he suddenly knew her name (and it would probably scare her away).

'I'm Dorothy, this is Toto, and we're going to the Emerald City.' Dorothy then told him what may have been her life story – the scarecrow tuned out after the first couple of sentences. He was brought back to the world when Dorothy turned to him. 'Oh, silly me,' she gushed. 'I've been going on about myself. What about _you_?'

Oh Oz. The scarecrow hadn't thought of his story. Attempting to bite his lip, but not succeeding, the scarecrow hurriedly invented a tale and shared it with Dorothy.

'What do you want from the Wizard?'

The scarecrow paused. Words jumped into his mouth, but he didn't use them. He didn't want to give himself away. Instead, the words he used surprised him. 'A brain.'

- - - - - -

Standing before the Wizard, he couldn't even try to ask what he really wanted to know.

'I want a brain. I need a brain.' He repeated hopelessly, a meaningless mantra.

'Well if I am to help you, you must do something for me.'

The scarecrow nodded. 'Yes, your Ozness.'

'Kill the Wicked Witch of the West.'

Horror ran through Fiyero, into every fibre of his being. No. Anything. Anything but that.

_Life is painless for the brainless._

Maybe that simply wasn't true.

A/N: You should all love me. :) I wrote this on the plane specially, as a going away present. Okay, it's more a coming back present, but you should love me anyway. R and R, my pretties, R and R. And thank you to the people who noted mistakes, I have changed what I could. Thanks for your help. :)


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